As the summer holidays come to an end, families everywhere are preparing for the return to school. While this can be an exciting time, it can also bring feelings of stress, worry and anxiety for children and young people, and for parents too.
After weeks of later mornings, different routines and more freedom, suddenly returning to early starts, school timetables, homework and busy days can feel overwhelming. For some children, the transition may be relatively smooth, while others may need a little more time, reassurance and support.
Getting Back Into a Routine
Starting to introduce a school routine before the first day can help make the transition feel less daunting. Try gradually bringing bedtimes and wake-up times closer to the usual school schedule, preparing uniforms and bags together, and talking through what the first few days might look like.
Keeping mornings as calm and predictable as possible can also help, particularly for children who find change difficult.
Starting a New School
For children starting a new school, moving up to secondary school or beginning somewhere unfamiliar, there may be additional worries.
Will I make friends? What if I get lost? Who will I sit with? What if I don’t fit in?
These concerns may seem small from an adult perspective, but they can feel enormous to a child. Acknowledge their worries rather than immediately trying to solve them. Remind them that lots of other children will be feeling nervous too and that friendships often take time to develop.
Keep the Conversation Open
One of the most valuable things parents can do is create opportunities for children to talk without feeling pressured.
Rather than simply asking, “How was school?”, try questions that encourage conversation, such as:
- What was the best part of your day?
- Was there anything that felt difficult today?
- Who did you spend time with?
- Was anything different from what you expected?
- Is there anything you’d like me to help you with?
Some children won’t want to talk as soon as they walk through the door — and that’s okay. They may open up later while eating dinner, travelling in the car, going for a walk or getting ready for bed. Letting them know you’re available when they’re ready can be more helpful than repeatedly asking questions.
Look Beyond “I’m Fine”
Children and young people don’t always have the words to explain when they’re struggling. Changes in sleep, appetite, mood or behaviour, increased irritability, withdrawing from family activities or regularly complaining of feeling unwell before school can sometimes indicate that something is worrying them.
Try to approach changes with curiosity and compassion rather than judgement. A simple “I’ve noticed you don’t seem quite yourself lately. Is there anything you want to talk about?” can open the door.
One Day at a Time
Returning to school is a big adjustment, particularly when a child is entering a new environment. There may be good days and difficult ones, and that’s completely normal.
Parents don’t need to have all the answers. Sometimes the most important thing you can offer is a safe space where your child knows they will be heard, believed and supported.
As the new school year begins, give your child — and yourself — time to adjust. New routines, friendships and confidence aren’t built overnight. With patience, reassurance and open communication, those first-day nerves can gradually give way to familiarity, confidence and a sense of belonging.
Find out more about the work we do to support children and young people via our website: https://www.futurelivinghertford.co.uk/young-people-services/ or email: [email protected]
